Cold call

Another weekday afternoon that just happened to be my day for volunteer chaplain duty at the hospital. There were no voice mails or written requests for a chaplain that afternoon. Even after checking at the nurse's station, I found no recommendations. So, I decided to round the floor and drop in on a patient or two, introduce myself, and offer any support from chaplain services. We used to call these cold calls in CPE. Neither the patient nor myself knew what to expect going into those encounters. (Not to be confused with Cold Case). The first was a friendly face. We've crossed paths from my many visits to Meadowview.

It was the second cold call that through me for a loop. I noticed the patient just sitting propped up in a recliner, covered with blankets, and all alone. Appearance alone seemed to indicate a different social class and a difficult life. This is why we're here - Enable folks to be heard, to feel valued. I entered and introduced myself. Immediately, the patient was alert and began moaning and moving her mouth. After a few seconds, I realized any speaking ability was severely limited and she was obviously in pain. There were no words. She tried moving her mouth to communicate but there was only a syallable here or there. I wasn't sure if it was a developmental disability, the result of her illness, her medication, or even a lack of education, but I had clearly bitten off more than I could chew. I tried a few more sentences initiating conversation. This time a little slower and clearer, only to receive a simialar moan and wince in response. At the same time, it seemed as if she wanted me in there. I looked myself over. Dressed up, nametag, clipboard in hand. Great, I thought to myself. She thinks I'm the doctor. What have I gotten myself into. Lord, get me out of here, I confessed to myself. In the next few seconds I tried to make it clear I was a pastor, not a doctor. I think she understood, even when I offered a blessing she seemed willing. You have to be careful when there's a communication barrier. You never want to violate a persons belief systems or values by forcing your own. So a word of blessing is appropriate. But, without any other knowledge, invoking Jesus' name over her would have been overstepping that trust. I said my goodbyes and made my exit (inwardly breathing a sigh of relief). What was I thinking? Glad that was over with, I thought to myself.
It's not always easy to answer a call to ministry on a daily basis or at any given moment - even when you're a 'minister'. There are some things that are just easier for us to stomach than others and we all have been pushed outside our comfort zones. That's how we grow. I knew God had been stretching me again that day - especially when I returned home and began looking at the lectionary psalm. And there it was in the 2nd verse: "Day to day pours forth speech, and night to night declares knowledge. There is no speech, nor are there words; their voice is not heard; yet their voice goes out through all the earth, and their words to the end of the world." The language of God. I felt ashamed and a little embarassed of my thoughts and feelings earlier. As it turns out, I was the abnormal one in the room. If God does it without words, telling the glory of God, why can't we. Perhaps that's exactly what she did on that weekday afternoon cold call.